Women: Snipers of the Subconscious...

Hey fellas. You ever been so hot for your girl that you just couldn't take it, and then she "innocently" decides to string together a series of sounds to make words to make a sentence that not only pops that pants baloon you've got going, but also lets the air out of your ego tires and shatters the illusion that she sticks around when you're annoying because you're the best thing since sliced bread met butter, but instead, it's simply because she loves you? (much less flattering...)
If that has happened to you, fret not, it's usually a side effect of being a male, and being heterosexual. 
We as men tend to have a Death Star-like weak point for women. We put our confidence and the measure of our self-esteem in their  hands, and that's basically the holomap from Star Wars that will lead the rebels right into the narrow path to our destruction from the inside.
Women have known about this weakness since Helen got Troy demolished and her husband and mistress murdered all for the sake of a fling. They've known about this since Eve convinced Adam to disobey God, even though, according to the Bible: A) She was already naked; and 2) Adam LITERALLY talked directly to God all the time. (In Adam's defense, God did hook him up with her. Way to let a bro down, God.)
The point is, women are dangerous, because men are slightly retarded when it comes to vagina. In fairness, it's not our fault. If you've ever had the opportunity (misfortune?) to see a vagina up close, and have the pressure on your head (innuendo) to have to please a woman while you're there, it's like trying to defuse a bomb with your tongue... or hand or fingers, or a small bomb defusing robot that you designed out of fear of the Al Quaedien nightmares you've been having since you watched Hurt Locker that one time.
But vagina bombs are neither here nor there. The fact of the matter is, we are in danger. We allow women to get into our heads, and set up perches at the edge of our sub-conscious. Women are highly trained snipers. They were trained to take down your defenses from afar, before you know what's happening, and then move into your headquarters and start controlling homebase.
Okay. No more metaphors. What I'm trying to say is that women will get in your head, and subtly control your thoughts and emotions. (I seriously thought that would make this whole thing sound a little simpler...) They say small things and it ends up making you feel like she somehow made that entire day that you fought a lion to get into a burning building and save those orphan babies and that expecting mother never even happened.
"Yeah, my ex-boyfriend wanted to be a celebrity. He started doing movies, but he just ended up doing porn. I'm not surprised."
Or...
"I don't really understand why women are always so stressed about guys with big penises. I've been with a guy with a big penis before, and it wasn't really all that. I'm perfectly happy with you."
(Think about it...) Or...
"Are you done already?"

These are the little bullets that take out Generals. There's no way to avoid these things. Now before you give up and decide to kiss your ass goodbye, I just wanna tell you, it get's better. I'd love to tell you that they eventually stop being such terrible creatures. No. What happens, is eventually you learn how to convince yourself that her ex-boyfriend probably had a super penis, or that she's probably a prostitute on her spare time. Or something like that. There's no real happy ending.