Into the Minds of Men Pt. 2

"What are you thinking about?"
This is the age old question that women love to ask men during times of perfect silence.
"Nothing." Is the almost adequate, yet completely honest answer we give back.
But nothing is never enough. It's impossible for most women to believe that a man could be sitting and have absolutely nothing on his mind, because most women have never experienced a moment when their conscious mind was completely blank and only processing whatever data was coming through, whether it's something in TV, or just sitting and listening to music. Men have a gift where sometimes, there could be no TV, no music, and yet we're silent and staring off into space, and when you ask us what we're thinking about, "Nothing." is all you get. Truth is, it probably still is just nothing. It's kind of like we're sleeping with our eyes open. I told you before in the first part of "Into the Minds of Men" that men aren't complicated. But I won't lecture you on the lack of information traveling through our heads. What I'll actually help you out with is when there actually is something happening up there.

"How do I look?"
You ask this question, and what's happening now, is we're processing the truth and seeing how much of a lie we need to mix in to make it believable. We have to factor in what we think you think about how you look, and how we think about how you look, and what you think we think we're expecting to say to you about how you look. It's a whole list of complicated algorithms and equations that you wouldn't really understand. But the end result is usually something like u+m+u-m+c. That's "what you think plus what we really think plus what you think minus the fact that we almost don't care plus a compliment". Here's how that works.
"How do I look?"
"Um, it's nice...." (looks for the thing that stands out the most about the outfit) "I like the...flowers."
"You sure it isn't like... too flowery?" (Warning: We've stopped caring already.)
And then things get difficult. You end up changing outfits anyway and not even asking our opinion about it, and we wonder why you asked in the first place. Was it to affirm that you didn't really want to wear the first one?

"What do you want to do/eat/see at the movies?"
 Usually we respond "Whatever you want to do/eat/see at the movies." and you go "I don't really know..." and then pitch a bunch of movies we have absolutely no interest in seeing.
In this case, we honestly DO NOT want to let you pick the movie/food or activity. If doing any of these things wasn't our idea, we usually hope you have a good idea but usually very little faith. If we agree to go along to something you invited us to, plan something. You would expect nothing like less from us.

"Why do you like me?"
Now I'll be honest. I have a very, very strong bias against this question. By Bias, I mean I hate it with a fiery passion. We express how and why I feel about you in different ways all the time. Learn your man. We give off signs, like telling you how sexy or beautiful or cute you look when you put on our shirt, or when you laugh or when you smile. We smile extra hard every time you make that meal, or sing in that beautiful voice of yours. We read you, and go out of our way to make sure you never run out of reasons to love us. Don't worry, we don't need you to do that. We got in it for who you are. We like you for everything you are, not what you think we think you should be. And if that's not enough, then it's because of blow jobs. You give great blow jobs.

These were just a few examples of some of the ways your average guy would respond to certain specific situations that he may get put into with a female friend or significant other.this isn't an all encompassing map into what your specific guy may be thinking, but it is a vague outline of what could be expected.You won't see it, and you won't hear it, but it's there. Just remember that you don't see it, and you don't hear it for a reason. It's my job to tell you the secrets. Not his.