So... the MILF...
Well I was out of town, (in Houston) at this Bahamas themed club event, with this girl I had met six hours earlier, who was from the Bahamas, and it was around 3 A.M., and I was sitting on the outskirts of the club just observing. During my time observing, I realized that young women of island origins generally don't think much of clothing. I mean, there was one girl there in a bra... and a fire-engine red mohawk... I know that wasn't really relevant, but it happened, and I thought it was crazy... anyway, there was another girl there in short... short... short shorts. As in they stopped, generally, at the top of her ass. one of the girls I was with was in a full dress, and it stopped at the middle of her ass. I guess I should give her a little credit, it did make it halfway...
Anyway, it's 3 A.M. on the 17th, and people are just arriving...
Let's back track a little...
It's about 9 A.M. on the 16th, and I'm jacking it. Everything's right: Mood- bored, Lights- off, Porn- on, Actress- Chanel Preston (look her up...). Anyway, I'm in the middle of doing the deed when, suddenly- I got nothing. I mean the video is in the middle of some really good stuff, but all of a sudden, I have absolutely no interest. As confusing as this was, I just chalked it up to too much "alone time" and maybe it was time for a break.
It's about 1 P.M. on the 16th, and I'm heading to the store for some chow, and I see a chick walking by. Good looking, early 20s, alone (no boyfriend or c-blocking friends) so, naturally I think about talking to her, when I realize, I'm just not interested. So I press on. I head into the mini-mall thing we have on base and head to the food court, when I see a few pretty young things sitting at a table. potential targets, definitely, but, I just wasn't diggin' it. So I get my food from the cute cashier without so much as a clever joke, and head back to my room. The days events reminded me of the night before, when I was dancing with this extra sexy young lady at the club, we're doing the whole grinding thing, ass to pelvis, and I mean she was well built with a great face, but some how, it didn't stir up a thing. I realized... girls don't interest me anymore.
Now, now dear readers, don't go telling the masses that poor little Sonata's out of the closet. Read on.
It's about 3 P.M. when I see a familiar girl walk past with a guy I never saw before. Behind her walked another girl, who, despite walking a little closer to the couple, didn't seem to be with them, or anyone else for that matter. I watched her walk by with, intrigue, for lack of a better word. Somewhat in her, and somewhat in whether I was completely off game for talking to girls altogether. So I go up to her, introduce myself in that way I do, and walk right into that glass door called "rejection". But neither being interested in her nor having anything better to do, I continued to talk to her. Long, uninteresting story short, about half an hour later, she invited me to come with her to Dallas, and then Houston for some kind of Jamaican/Bahamian- themed club event. I thought about it, and with a few more episodes of the Young Justice cartoon to finish, and an uneaten, refrigerated McDonald's cheeseburger to microwave back to health, not to mention a nap or two to get around to, I already had quite a full plate in front of me, but I decided that I'd already napped, tooned, and munched McD's, but had yet to party with people I had just met from the Bahamas. So I went. We made the two and a half hour trip from here to to Dallas, then the three hour trip from Dallas to Houston. We arrived around 1 A.M.
Now, it's about 4:30 A.M., and the party has officially started. People are on the dance floor, the music is blaring, the bass is literally penetrating my chest cavity, and the freakily dressed women are shaking their barely covered asses. Things were pretty awesome, despite my financially induced sobriety, which then hindered my dancing ability. So I sat where we began, on the outskirts of the dance floor in chairs acquired from somewhere in the back. The two island chicks had wandered off onto the middle of the dance floor, and I just enjoyed the sights. The scantily clad women were interesting, but not impressive. There was even a Mini Minaj. She had an ass the size of 2/3 a basketball, and a waist you could almost wrap your hands around. She also wore a Minaj-style onesie. It was made out of what looked like leggings style wallpaper, and I have no idea how she got it on. There were no clear signs of zippers or buttons. Maybe she painted it on...?
Anyway. I was just watching and enjoying, when I saw.... The MILF. She was amazing. Mature, sexy. Long, straight flowing hair, light brown skin... She was thick, but not even at the level of chubby. Just thick. She was probably about mid- to late thirties. She wore a reasonably tight pair of jeans, some leather boots, and a white button up shirt that hugged her... oh, so right. She and a friend headed over to the seats left unsat in by my new island friends, and sat. My heart raced. I ran through all of my possible pick-up lines that I'd been using for the past two months, and all of them came up lacking. This was no girl. This was a woman. I had to come up with something good. The best thing I could come up with was:
"You ladies look out of place." I would say.
"How/Why?" She would ask.
"Because your clothes actually fit." I would reply.
She would laugh. She would then ask me if I wanted to go to her place so she could show me everything I've been missing. I would say yes. She would rock my world, and I hers. I would propose. She would accept. We would marry and have children. I would die at 70 going 264 mph in a Bugatti Veyron 18.4 Supersport leaving my millions to my young, mid thirties mistress.
She sat next to me, dancing in her seat, touching me occasionally. I prepared my line. Then I thought, what if she takes it the wrong way?
"You ladies look out of place." I would say.
"Fuck you."
I had to try something though. And this was the best line I had for an older woman in a place like this. I took a deep breath...
"You ladies look out of place." I said in her ear.
"What?!" she asked.
"You ladies look out of place." I yelled in her ear.
"What?!" she asked.
"You ladies look out of place." I said even louder in her ear.
"How?!" she asked.
(Oh thank God...)
"Because your clothes actually fit..." I yelled to her.
She laughed, touching my thigh for a moment.
No sexual proposal. On to plan B. What was plan B?
I then tried starting some kind of small talk, asking some kind of question once every 5 minutes. She always answered enthusiastically, but I was just...
At some point, midst my silence and her dancing in her seat, she was invited by one of her friends to the dance floor, but before she left, she got up and told me to hold her seat. She reached over and grabbed me by the arm, and the thigh, and slid me into her seat. She then went to dance. Some girl came over to ask me for one of the seats I had my ass cheek on, to which I relinquished reluctantly and the girl ran off. I would reserve the remaining chair for my future dominatrix. The MILF then returned from dancing and asked me what happened to the other chair, I told her I gave it up, but the last one was for her, I could stand, at which, I stood. She then took my arm, tossed me back in the chair, and said...
"You gotta hold that for me."
... and turned around, and proceeded to dance. Right there. In front of me, her ass at eye level. I tried not to stare, but... damn. And then... Yeah. my already ridiculously tight jeans managed to shrink even more.
I needed to seal this deal. This was it. She was the thing that I had been missing. A sexy, mature, goddess...
"We'll be back."
...her friend said in my ear, as she grabbed my angel by her arm and went off towards the bathroom. I sighed and looked around, hoping no one saw me in my trance. I rubbed my chin, less to mess with my facial, hair and more to check for drool. I took one more deep breath, and decided,
When they come back, I will ask for her number. I couldn't forgive myself if I didn't.
They never came back...
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