This is the third installment of this series on girls. And I will begin with the same disclaimer as always: NOT ALL GIRLS ARE THE SAME, AND THIS IS NOT BY ANY MEANS, A COMPLETE GUIDE TO GETTING GIRLS (yet). Now in the first part I promised to cover how to get out of the friendzone. I WILL cover that in this blog. I will also tell you how to please a woman. YAY! Now some of you who know me will may say "But you're very inexperienced in that area, Sonata, how ever could you do that?" To which I may or may not say FUCK YOU I know what I'm talking about. But we'll get to that a little later. Now, as always this is especially targeted towards my more unattractive audience, but this particular installment in my series can be for anyone of any visual wealth status.
First, I will begin to talk about the general courtship of straight (or perhaps bisexual) American Girls, and how to please them. I have no idea how gay guys or girls work and am really not very interested in either. In my studies of each kind of girl, the many different brands, styles and types. I haven't seen them all but I've seen enough to say, most women never want the truth. In this situation I'm only saying most because I make it a point to not generalize every single woman in the world. But I say most and I expect you to place this label on every woman you see just in case. Women want the perfect man. As a gentlemen, you will most likely avoid the perfect woman or at least look for a woman's flaws to prove that she's not too good too be true. So when getting into a relationship it is very important to give her what she wants. Now some of you might wonder, "What do women want?" This is a good question, don't feel bad for not knowing after all this time. Not all women want the same thing, the only constant is that they want. They don't want you, they just want what you could be. In short, they want perfection. Now we all know that perfection doesn't exist, so how do you give someone something that doesn't exist? You don't, really. You lie. Lie just the right amount to get the job done... give them the world. You might lie about how good you are at something. In these rare (and in this situation, it really should be rare) cases, just do a little studying up on the subject. And make sure that the lie isn't too unbelievable.
Here's an example.
"I'm an astronaut." - TOO BIG
"I know an astronaut." -A little less.
"I've met an astronaut before." -Just right.
But lies like these are trivial and unimportant. What you need to lie about is far more important to the relationship. Lie about how you feel about her. Lie about how she looks. Lie about where she ranks in comparison to your old girlfriends when it comes to cooking, kissing, sex, whatever. She's always the best. Remember that.
Now there are rare occasions when you should be honest to her. Maybe you're down in the dumps and need a little support. Maybe her ass really is hanging out of her jeans. Maybe her stomach is too big for that halter top.
Now I'm not telling you to be a chronic liar. What I want you to do, Gollum, is to know when to lie.
Now for the part you've all been waiting for. HOW TO GET OUT OF THE FRIENDZONE. But first, for all of my readers (which may or may not be at a whopping 3 right about now) who don't know what the friendzone is, I will explain. The friendzone is where a person has feelings for another person, and that person has expressed only feelings of friendship back. Often One person asks the other out, and the other will reply, "I just don't see you that way." or "I just wanna be friends." or "I only see you as a friend." which may be accompanied by "Nothing more." A variation on this could be "You're like a brother to me." This is some of the worst rejection known to man.
Now the reason the friendzone is so dreaded is because despite other forms of rejection, you can't work your way out of it. All of your nice gestures and compliments only attribute to how good a friend you are. It's like quicksand. The more you struggle, the faster you go DOWN.
Now for the key out of this horrible place. ARE YOU READY? This was a secret told to me by my brother, John. Well the secret coveted by millions of guys is actually very simple but for some, very hard to do. For the girl or guy in question, you have to cut the ties. Stop communications. Give it a couple months, Maybe a year. Feel like thats a little extreme? Well you shouldn't have put yourself in that situation. Anyway. After a few months to a year, when you come back, you'll have a clean slate to work with. You should be set far enough back to where you have a mild advantage on other guys because of your history. But Even then, you have to be on your toes, because it's very easy for you to slip right on back into the friendzone. If she has a boyfriend or significant other already, it's best you fade your ass right back into the shadows, but just keep up with her. Don't be too far away so that you can't be back in time for a status update, like I said before, bad timing is your worst enemy...
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